I am terrified of angry people.
All types. Not just the silent broody, but secretly fuming people, but also the yelling out loud continuously until everyone in the area of 500 miles has a headache and any other types out there.
Angry people always kill my mood. I have an insane respect for those who can withstand a barrage of yelling and then turn around and be if not cheerful, at least not completely quenched by the fury.
When people are angry at me, whatever I do is tainted by doubts. Maybe I should not have said that, maybe I should have done that, maybe I should have said that one thing, maybe I should apologize…
This happens with whomever, but when a close friend is mad at me, things get worse. I stop focusing, I start stressing, and I am insurmountably unhappy.
What makes everything so much worse is that whenever I think I am finally over that one person: that one friend who has stopped talking to me, I am reminded of something they said or did and there I go again, doubting myself and rehashing the past.
But as long as I never know who is mad at me, I should be fine.